Unexpected
Angels
Sudden Deaths
When
death comes suddenly and unexpectedly and the "WHY?"
is never answered and you ask "How could this have happened?"
Your life is suddenly washed away like the sand and your family
unit, the foundation of all that you knew, is taken from you
in an instant. Losing a parent, a child or a spouse suddenly
is like a wave crashing against a rock. The impact is hard
and it can break away pieces that were once solid and strong.
We
search for the answers but it leaves us feeling helpless and
frustrated. Suddenly like a sand castle your world has crumbled
and the answers are not found. You begin to blame yourself,
and then comes the questions, "what if I had", "If
only I did". We can’t change the "what ifs".
Like castles in the sand, rebuilding your life against the
waves seems futile. The
"waves" of the questions that may never be answered
may keep you from rebuilding and keep you from reaching that
calm and that peace. You need to give yourself time to let
the waters settle and move away from the guilt, the unanswered
questions and work towards understanding that you can't change
what happened. You have no control over fate and like the
waves washing against the shore, you can't stop it or control
it.
As
time goes on, by sharing your feelings, your fears, your guilt
and growing towards the hope that you will one day feel the
calmness, we learn to stop blaming ourselves or wishing we
had the power of control over life and death. Together we
learn that we really have nothing to forgive ourselves for
and know that we can only accept the things we cannot
control.
Margie
